In the OR this morning, Stanislaw said, I am your anaesthesiologist. Please give me your right wrist. I will start your IV where I will first administer This, then this, then this. I thought, now is a good time To practice dying. He placed a mask over my nose and said, You will feel a little something. Can you roll onto your left side? He said, now I am introducing the Main ingredient into the mix. Count backwards please– Six, five, four, three… And he killed me. Next thing I heard was Emily Asking if I wanted crackers and Cranberry juice. She said, I am a Christian, and I talk to God. I asked, Is he everything?
David, my brother... Thank you for checking on me. Yes. I am far from dead. I am very happy to hear you are back in the grove.
It just hit me this afternoon in a delayed reaction, that this experience for me sort of mirrored the one for you a couple of weeks ago when you were written out and cooped up inside and you imagined your multiverse doppelganger trail riding the beach cliffs in a parallel galaxy. This felt like that for me. Like one version of me went under the anesthesia, and then my multiverse twin woke up. With my usual muddled memories as intact as they ever are... Which is to say, pretty darn muddled.
Megan! Thank you for reading and feeling it. I hope the move goes well. Don't give another thought to the reading. I am in no kind of hurry. Take your time and be where you are. It will all come in time. Cheers.
First , glad you came back from being dead to write this. And two, interesting idea. I had to mull it over a bit. My short version of what you are suggesting (or Emily’s premise) is “we think, therefore there is a god.”
Hey Lori... I miss you. Been in Spokane to visit the little boy. I bounced him in front of the mirror and sang a little song for him about how, since God is dead ever since Nietzsche, it is up to us to make our own meaning in the world.
It isn't easy to find an improvisational bouncy rhyme for Nietzsche. I may have used "Pizza".
We bounced in and out of view playing peek a boo.
Everything in this poem happened. Poetry is weird because you can tell such a short edited version of a thing and it is still true though heavily redacted.
In this case, while I respect it, the modified and twisted like a pretzel Cartesian view of I think therefore God is...was entirely Emily's idea. Its funny that that is the part of the conversation that I remember.
I have a pretty big backlog of Lori things to catch up on.
:) Hey John. OR is a boolean modifier. Emily was a poet from Amherst. Graham sadly is dead, but he was a memorable King Arthur using coconuts as a substitute for horses, and a Graham cracker is Graham in a good mood?
I approve of Emily. Thank God for the Boolean operator; I thought at first you might be referring to what we here in the UK, oddly enough, call a 'theatre'. (But then isn't a battlefield also called a theatre? A 'theatre of operations', no less!) (The show apparently is unending.)
No ordinary mind. The old dies away for the new to be born. Aho friend. Also I have not forgotten your reading. I’m moving this week. So that’s a fun adventure with boxes and trucks and I’m not able to float off into outer space to bring messages back. Just yet.
hehe. I learned Aho from my elder friend from canada- it’s a way to say we are one. which is why it means thank you or amen :) Never saw res dogs! Thank you for the beautiful blessing for the move!
Swift recovery, Jed. Clever poem!! Clearly you have a twist of devious angel in your genetics. Good you didn’t lose it in your little death and rebirth. Cheers!
I take “devious angel” as a compliment. Alan Watts always said that we all have a dose of irrepressible rascality. I always like that thought. David Kirkby (If you haven’t looked at his poetry it is so good) and I talk about these multiverse doppelgangers of ourselves running around in parallel universes. So if one of our iterations runs into bad luck, there is another version in a galaxy not far away doing similar things. So when something like this happens, we wonder if one of us died somewhere, and the first person view just shifted seamlessly to another :)
Oh I have very much made acquaintance with Dave and Meg! Absolutely love them both a both are incredibly talented besides golden people. Honestly, Jed, I owe you such a huge thank you for being the one to connect me with so many people. It was you reposting my work that started the domino effect, to which I am indebted to you. And 100% I agree with Alan...as I know I definitely have my rascally side, too! We are among good company. 😊✨
Too kind guys. Ya know I’m thinking if-when a few of us. An meet up we can almost book a Restaurant level for the big table! Can’t think of a better way to do our bit to help your economy than visit, lunch, and fly everyone out here to verify my imagery as relatively real, haha.
Oh I adore Alan Watts (and Terence MacKenna also).
I do t think I’ve caught SaintDave at the right moment with these guys and their writings, talks etc yet. You inspire me. I try again … this next time I’ll begin with, “hey now, Jed’s heard of Alan Watts - wanna check him out again together?” Trouble is I’ll need a rainy day to sit him still back in Brushy (ie the grove)
Mostly routine and planned for, and I seem to be okay. Feeling pretty chipper at the moment.
I think She has her own ideas about what to do with me, and I am never quite in the inner circle. Some degree of surprise seems to always be baked in.
I understand you are back on home turf in the land of exquisite sunsets and remarkable critters. You feeling better?
The crackers were really among the best I have ever tasted. Odd for right out of an individually wrapped vending machine packet. I have heard that hunger is the best sauce?
Right? Do you notice, Trevor, about being a poet, you periodically turn up these ideas…and its not that you have never heard them before. But something about the framing is just a little bit strange and new and cast from a different light…in this case offered by a nurse randomly. And something about it hit me as insight. Reboot indeed. And seriously, or humorously, is there anything better than a mini-mental reboot?
How can it be that we live in a world where we can die again and again (by choice even!) and we hand the task of life-giving to a total stranger? Perhaps it’s an exercise we should practice regularly, to lean on a stranger for life. Or rather, we could notice that we already do.
Happy to report that I went under for what seemed like a...nothing at all, and then I was awake. Whole thing took less than 10 mins and my neck/arm should be good for a few months at least. The only difference that I can see between this and a longer surgery is....nothing at all, except recovery (from say, knee replacement) takes much much longer because of acute pain. The last longer surgery I had was in Dec., 2024, and even though they intubated me, I only had a little sore throat....modern medicine. Beats the hell out of biting a bullet. I'm all for inferring with "God's will" whenever possible.
Wow. A lot has been coming up for me lately around the word "attention" and how I receive it. Your encouragement is carrying so much weight and meaning. I feel honored and seen. It's tender. I'd be glad to share the lyrics with you 🥲🙏🏼
While it was not a conscious association at the time, it is clear and obvious in retrospect that it was meant to be published in celebration of your 60 full planetary years.
I am assuming, friend Jed, that like Sam Clemens this report of your death was an exaggeration?
Welcome back to the land of the think we are living (but may be a computer simulation).
Seriously - hope you are well and okay.
I'm taking new Poetry to be good sign!
Dave and M :)
David, my brother... Thank you for checking on me. Yes. I am far from dead. I am very happy to hear you are back in the grove.
It just hit me this afternoon in a delayed reaction, that this experience for me sort of mirrored the one for you a couple of weeks ago when you were written out and cooped up inside and you imagined your multiverse doppelganger trail riding the beach cliffs in a parallel galaxy. This felt like that for me. Like one version of me went under the anesthesia, and then my multiverse twin woke up. With my usual muddled memories as intact as they ever are... Which is to say, pretty darn muddled.
Oof. This was a recent experience? I didn't know that. Well, yes, glad you came back unscathed. And with the proper memories.
Megan! Thank you for reading and feeling it. I hope the move goes well. Don't give another thought to the reading. I am in no kind of hurry. Take your time and be where you are. It will all come in time. Cheers.
I’m glad you’re back safe and brought poetry back with you, Jed
Thank you, Paul. It feels good to be back at my writing desk for a few minutes, and I look forward to getting back in a groove. Take care.
Glad to see this. Too little has been written about those little "practice deaths" and the changes they leave for us to ponder.
Thank you, Bob. Have you experienced this too? Guys like us of a certain age, it’s only a matter of time. Always appreciate your thoughts. Take care.
I have. You, too.
First , glad you came back from being dead to write this. And two, interesting idea. I had to mull it over a bit. My short version of what you are suggesting (or Emily’s premise) is “we think, therefore there is a god.”
Hey Lori... I miss you. Been in Spokane to visit the little boy. I bounced him in front of the mirror and sang a little song for him about how, since God is dead ever since Nietzsche, it is up to us to make our own meaning in the world.
It isn't easy to find an improvisational bouncy rhyme for Nietzsche. I may have used "Pizza".
We bounced in and out of view playing peek a boo.
Everything in this poem happened. Poetry is weird because you can tell such a short edited version of a thing and it is still true though heavily redacted.
In this case, while I respect it, the modified and twisted like a pretzel Cartesian view of I think therefore God is...was entirely Emily's idea. Its funny that that is the part of the conversation that I remember.
I have a pretty big backlog of Lori things to catch up on.
My underwear and Nietzsche’s
Are both adorned with peaches
I see we shop in the same online store for briefs
Crispy and delicious your poem, Jed, all things considered :)
Fotini, your ability to focus on the important parts, simply and clearly, it’s so you.
Well, thank you for the compliment, Jed!
I hope you're feeling better :)
What is an OR? Who is Emily? Who is Graham? What is a Graham cracker?
:) Hey John. OR is a boolean modifier. Emily was a poet from Amherst. Graham sadly is dead, but he was a memorable King Arthur using coconuts as a substitute for horses, and a Graham cracker is Graham in a good mood?
I approve of Emily. Thank God for the Boolean operator; I thought at first you might be referring to what we here in the UK, oddly enough, call a 'theatre'. (But then isn't a battlefield also called a theatre? A 'theatre of operations', no less!) (The show apparently is unending.)
No ordinary mind. The old dies away for the new to be born. Aho friend. Also I have not forgotten your reading. I’m moving this week. So that’s a fun adventure with boxes and trucks and I’m not able to float off into outer space to bring messages back. Just yet.
Hi Megan - your comment reminds me of “Aho young warrior” scenes from Res Dogs…. I hope your “Skoden” move is fast and favorable!
hehe. I learned Aho from my elder friend from canada- it’s a way to say we are one. which is why it means thank you or amen :) Never saw res dogs! Thank you for the beautiful blessing for the move!
Swift recovery, Jed. Clever poem!! Clearly you have a twist of devious angel in your genetics. Good you didn’t lose it in your little death and rebirth. Cheers!
— sylvia 🌞
I take “devious angel” as a compliment. Alan Watts always said that we all have a dose of irrepressible rascality. I always like that thought. David Kirkby (If you haven’t looked at his poetry it is so good) and I talk about these multiverse doppelgangers of ourselves running around in parallel universes. So if one of our iterations runs into bad luck, there is another version in a galaxy not far away doing similar things. So when something like this happens, we wonder if one of us died somewhere, and the first person view just shifted seamlessly to another :)
Oh I have very much made acquaintance with Dave and Meg! Absolutely love them both a both are incredibly talented besides golden people. Honestly, Jed, I owe you such a huge thank you for being the one to connect me with so many people. It was you reposting my work that started the domino effect, to which I am indebted to you. And 100% I agree with Alan...as I know I definitely have my rascally side, too! We are among good company. 😊✨
Too kind guys. Ya know I’m thinking if-when a few of us. An meet up we can almost book a Restaurant level for the big table! Can’t think of a better way to do our bit to help your economy than visit, lunch, and fly everyone out here to verify my imagery as relatively real, haha.
Oh I adore Alan Watts (and Terence MacKenna also).
I do t think I’ve caught SaintDave at the right moment with these guys and their writings, talks etc yet. You inspire me. I try again … this next time I’ll begin with, “hey now, Jed’s heard of Alan Watts - wanna check him out again together?” Trouble is I’ll need a rainy day to sit him still back in Brushy (ie the grove)
I like it when rainy days knock me out of my patterns. Alan Watts...that dude was a talker. I listen to him some nights to put me to sleep.
Jed! I’m sorry I hadn’t known you were having surgery.
Really hope all has gone well.
God can remain at Her distance in her heaven, leaving you for some other day.
Though ….
Just in case you did die leaving the crackers’n’cranberry …. maybe 🤔 you could ask Her (god) to make you a
💡💥⚡️•••••——- JEDI —-•••••••⚡️💥💡
You’d already have most of the 🧬 DNA in place having been a whole Jed
and those light-sabre thingys would be fun to play with in the higher dimensions ?
Seriously tho’ may the force be with you as you recover.
Meg x 🎨
Meg!
These are not the droids you are looking for...
:)
I'm fine.
Mostly routine and planned for, and I seem to be okay. Feeling pretty chipper at the moment.
I think She has her own ideas about what to do with me, and I am never quite in the inner circle. Some degree of surprise seems to always be baked in.
I understand you are back on home turf in the land of exquisite sunsets and remarkable critters. You feeling better?
The crackers were really among the best I have ever tasted. Odd for right out of an individually wrapped vending machine packet. I have heard that hunger is the best sauce?
Take care my dear.
Ahhh ya make me laugh out loud friend!
"Think about it…Everything starts with a thought."
🤯 I can't stop repeating that line. It's like my own mind's reboot hahaha.
Right? Do you notice, Trevor, about being a poet, you periodically turn up these ideas…and its not that you have never heard them before. But something about the framing is just a little bit strange and new and cast from a different light…in this case offered by a nurse randomly. And something about it hit me as insight. Reboot indeed. And seriously, or humorously, is there anything better than a mini-mental reboot?
Yes! Like a Zen master giving me a good whack with his staff to wake me up.
How can it be that we live in a world where we can die again and again (by choice even!) and we hand the task of life-giving to a total stranger? Perhaps it’s an exercise we should practice regularly, to lean on a stranger for life. Or rather, we could notice that we already do.
Happy to report that I went under for what seemed like a...nothing at all, and then I was awake. Whole thing took less than 10 mins and my neck/arm should be good for a few months at least. The only difference that I can see between this and a longer surgery is....nothing at all, except recovery (from say, knee replacement) takes much much longer because of acute pain. The last longer surgery I had was in Dec., 2024, and even though they intubated me, I only had a little sore throat....modern medicine. Beats the hell out of biting a bullet. I'm all for inferring with "God's will" whenever possible.
Wow. A lot has been coming up for me lately around the word "attention" and how I receive it. Your encouragement is carrying so much weight and meaning. I feel honored and seen. It's tender. I'd be glad to share the lyrics with you 🥲🙏🏼
I take it as a good sign and a gift — and possibly a bit of kismet — that this very excellent and convivial poem was posted on my sixtieth birthday.
While it was not a conscious association at the time, it is clear and obvious in retrospect that it was meant to be published in celebration of your 60 full planetary years.
All fun stuff to read. thanks